Chris and I mentioned to our friend, Ben Newson, that Kristen's mission was not always sunshine and roses for her, and that she had days where she struggled. He shared with us some of his experiences, and we, in turn, asked if he would mind sharing them with Kristen.
This is his thoughtful and kind response:
Sister Kline!
I hope this email finds you working with all your heart, might, mind, and strength!
What a blessing and privilege to be in the service of the Lord!
I heard you finally made it to Australia! Glad that worked out.
It was amazing to me on my mission to see a different part of the world and how differently people lived in other parts of the world. It was both fun and humbling to see this difference from my own home in Colorado.
I wanted to share a story and experience from my mission that has helped me. Hopefully it helps you. Strap in this is a long email ;)
First the story...
There once was a man who was asleep one night in his cabin when suddenly his room filled with light and the Savior appeared to him.
The Lord told him He had a work for him to do and showed him a large rock explaining that he was to push against the rock with all his might.
This the man did, and for many days, he toiled from sunup to sundown; his shoulder set squarely against the cold massive surface of the rock, pushing with all his might.
Each night the man returned to his cabin sore and worn out, feeling his whole day had been spent in vain.
Seeing that the man showed signs of discouragement, Satan decided to enter the picture–placing thoughts in the man’s mind, such as “Why kill yourself over this? You’re never going to move it!” or “Boy, you’ve been at it a long time and you haven’t even scratched the surface!” etc., giving the man the impression that the task was impossible and the man was an unworthy servant because he wasn’t moving the massive stone.
These thoughts discouraged and disheartened the man and he started to ease up in his efforts. “Why kill myself?” he thought. “I’ll just put in my time putting forth just the minimum of effort and that will be good enough.” And this he did or at least planned on doing until, one day, he decided to take his troubles to the Lord.
“Lord,” he said, “I have labored hard and long in Your service, putting forth all my strength to do that which You have asked of me. Yet after all this time, I have not even budged that rock even half a millimeter. What is wrong? Why am I failing?”
To this the Lord responded compassionately, “My friend, when long ago I asked you to serve Me and you accepted, I told you to push against the rock with all your strength and that you have done. But never once did I mention to you that I expected you to move it. At least not by yourself. Your task was to push. And now you come to Me, your strength spent, thinking that you have failed, ready to quit. But is this really so?
"Look at yourself. Your arms are strong and muscled; your back sinewed and brown. Your hands are calloused from constant pressure and your legs have become massive and hard. Through opposition you have grown much and your ability now far surpasses that which you used to have. Yet still, you haven’t succeeded in moving the rock; and you come to Me now with a heavy heart and your strength spent.
I, my friend, will move the rock. Your calling was to be obedient and push, and to exercise your faith and trust in My wisdom, and this you have done.”
Now you might guess where this is going but I wanted to share something about experiences with companions while serving as a missionary.
I was asked to work with some problem elders on my mission. I guess I was the babysitter, but I learned early in the mission that I needed to humble myself to have the spirit in my companionship. Without that, the work was frustrated and no one was having any fun.
Let me explain.
My MTC companion hated me. I don’t think I really knew why but guess he thought I was arrogant and proud, which I was. But he would not follow the rules. Stupid stuff like getting out of bed on time and getting to MTC church on time. Just little stuff like that. Not stuff that you get sent home for, but just enough to annoy everyone around you.
I had to learn to let go of some of my expectations for what I wanted my mission to be and learn to work together with someone that maybe I didn’t want to or didn’t agree with on many many fronts. It was hard.
Fast forward to Argentina when the mission president assigned me an elder that was so homesick he would barely work. “Work with him, Elder Newson.” I was told.
I learned to not get upset at the many breaks throughout the day that we would need to take because he was tired. Or the lack of companionship study we would do because of his unwillingness to participate. I could have been very upset with him as many of his previous companions had been and not gotten along and not had any success in our area. But from my MTC experience, I knew we had to have the spirit with us if we were going to have any chance of success.
So, I let go of some of the frustration and just loved him. It wasn’t easy. I started by shining his shoes. Something I had heard about growing up but was surprised no one did it or that no companion of mine really ever shined my shoes.
I started to encourage the breaks during the days in the hot sun and would stop for a drink or ice cream to make the break better.
Slowly our companionship got better and my companion became more willing to do things he would never do like companionship study.
I stopped being constantly upset with him on the little things I thought he was falling short on. I stopped thinking of him dragging me down and stopped focusing on where I thought things were supposed to be or how my mission was supposed to be.
I realized that this is what the Savior does with each of us. He meets us where we are. He doesn’t chastise us for where we should be. Or get angry at us that we are not where he is. Or get frustrated that he has to “work” with us because we are not at his level. He loves us. He serves us. He loves and encourages our effort. He works with us on where we are at and he makes up the rest.
I became better for doing that with my companion and left the rest to the Lord. Like the story above. He can do more with the rocks/challenges/companions in our lives than we can. He requires trust, effort and work.
I hope this is helpful. And hope you find joy in the service of your mission. A lot of growth and change happened for me. Most of which was not easy. I loved my mission for what it did for me and how I was able to bless others. It wasn’t easy or everything I imagined it to be before I got there. But it turned out to be what I needed and what the Lord needed me to learn and become. His Disciple.